The Floors Were Sticky

I don’t remember when I first heard about the XXX theater just across the state line. When I was a teen, I hung out with an older crowd so, maybe I learned of the place that way. Then once when traveling, I saw its billboard from the highway. Going there became an entry on my “to do” list, when I was old enough.

So, sometime after I turned 18 I rounded up a guy friend and we headed to that place that had held so much allure for so many years. He was kind of a shy type and I thought that seeing him blush would just add to this awesome experience we were going to have. Back then, the place was fairly isolated with only a cheap motel next door. There are no windows and the name is emblazoned in large tacky red neon letters on the front and there is “private” parking in the back.

The first thing to hit me when I walked in the door was the stench of cigarette smoke. You first walk through a room that has all the porno DVDs[1. Dizzyguy reminded me that it would have been video tapes back then. I’m getting old.] and magazines. Then you enter the room with the cash register and in there is where you’ll find the sex toys. What I didn’t know back then is that their selection of toys was pretty poor and mostly all made of jelly or other questionable porous materials. We walked around looking at the sex toys for a little while… and yes, he was blushing.

Then we went to the counter and asked to pay to go into the theater. The guy told us how much it would be and my friend asked if that paid for me as well and he said something like, “as long as you claim her.” I didn’t know then that there are actually two theaters, one playing hetero movies and the other playing gay movies. The guy at the counter didn’t say anything about it. We just happened to end up in the one playing the hetero movies.

The room was really too warm and had an unpleasant odor. There were around 25 seats. We chose to sit toward the rear, near the door. I can’t even remember what kind of scene was happening up on the screen. Once my eyes adjusted to the darkness I looked around and realized I was the only woman in there. Then I saw that men were lined up standing against the walls with their penises out, masturbating. I started feeling uncomfortable. I felt like all eyes had shifted from the screen, onto me. Scenarios of really bad things happening in there, started going through my head and I whispered to my friend, “this is kind of creepy, huh?” He agreed. I told him that I thought we should leave and that I would quickly get up and head for the door and he should stay right behind me and we got the hell out of there. I never went back.

I don’t know what I really expected to see in a porno theater. It did surprise me to see guys lined up on the walls with their dicks out. Is that just normal for a place like this? I guess I thought there would be other couples in there but we were the only one.  We didn’t see it when we were there but apparently, the place has peep show booths with glory holes in the walls. All those years ago, the place was fairly isolated with not much going on around it, except the creepy cheap motel. Now though, growth has come to the area and new businesses have located nearby. There’s even a mega church just down the road. A really nice furniture store has been built next to the theater. The theater’s billboard looms directly over the furniture store’s property.

I try to have a open mind about most things but this place just creeped me out. I didn’t feel safe there. I think it’s these kinds of places that a lot of people imagine when you say the words “sex shop”. I know for many years, it was my only exposure to a place that sold sex toys. Only now do I know that clean, bright, positive, safe places exist that sell sex toys. We don’t have anyplace like that around here but luckily, through the internet I’ve come to know that they exist. I would love to have a shop like that around here but it’s not likely to happen. There are church groups trying really hard to get the creepy theater shut down so, I could just imagine the resistance there would be toward opening a sex shop, even if it was the wonderful, positive, women and couples friendly kind of place I’ve come to know on the internet.

I’m sharing my first experience in a sex shop as part of Redhead Bedhead’s My First Time project where sex bloggers are sharing their stories to support the fundraising campaign for the second leg of her Sexshop Superhero Tour, through which her mission is to: “…let people know these shops exist so that they can find places they are comfortable exploring their sexuality…” and “…to include retailer education as well. Lots of shops want to do it right- they want to be superheroes!- they just don’t know how. I think we’re changing that.”