May 162016
 

Maia Zoe

Even though wand type massagers aren’t my clit’s favorite kind of vibe, I found the Maia Zoe interesting because of the dual motors. There’s one in the head (of course) and there’s one in the handle. So, that’s kind of unique but not completely original because Cal Ex made one with dual motors first. There may be others but that’s the only other one I know of.

First, full disclosure: the first Zoe I received was defective. The charging cable’s pin did not fit into the charging port correctly. It was too loose and would not snap into place like you’d expect. The silicone around the port almost pushed it all the way back out. I could get it to intermittently work by forcefully pushing it in and jiggling it around. Clearly, something wasn’t right.

I contacted Maia and described the problem. They apologized and sent a replacement with no hassle. The new Zoe did not have the same problem. The charging pin for the new Zoe fit into place just right. When I compared the new and old charging cables, it seemed as though the pin on the old defective one was slightly shorter than the new one. So, that means, depending on how many defective ones are out there, you might end up with one. But I think Maia knows that they have an issue with the Zoe and they would probably replace it with no problem and I know PeepShow Toys will also take care of their customers.

Alright, technical difficulties aside, what did I think? When I first turned on the motor in the head I actually uttered the words, “holy shit”. I wasn’t expecting it to have that kind of power and rumble. I was fully prepared to tell you that it was buzzy and weak as fuck. But it’s nice that I can still be surprised.

Now, what about the motor in the handle? Well, let me tell you… it’s buzzier than a beehive being raided by a black bear1. And it’s pretty weak to boot. I honestly don’t see the point in having the motor in the handle when it feels so underwhelming.

The two motors are independently controlled, which is good. You can also have one turned on while the other is off, which is also good. Both motors can be on at the same time, if you happen to find a way to use it like that.

Maia Zoe back

The silicone is a nice powdery soft kind that produces little drag. They put this inexplicable area of plastic chrome on the backside of the wand. Not only does it look tacky but creates seams that didn’t need to exist.

The Zoe is waterproof and water-based lube is recommended. To my total surprise and disbelief, it comes with a storage pouch. That’s right, a lower priced brand can manage to do what luxury companies like Fun Factory can’t. It ain’t much but I thought it was a nice touch. Oh and, it’s USB rechargeable. Almost forgot to mention that.

Alright, so what did my picky-ass clit think of the Zoe? Well, obviously that buzzy-as-fuck handle end was getting nowhere near it but as for the strong, rumbly head? With the size of the head, it’s totally feasible that you could insert that end into your vag, if you felt so compelled. I did not. The Zoe was meant for my clit and only my clit.

And with a generous helping of some Good Clean Love lube, I began rubbing that rumbling head against my clit. It felt good but I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to orgasm, and then… it happened, twice. Granted, it didn’t happen as quickly as when I use something like my We-Vibe Touch but it did happen, despite the fact that the Zoe really isn’t my ideal kind of vibe. So, if it is the sort of vibe you prefer then it might just rock your socks… erm, I mean, give you good orgasms.

Maia Zoe details

So, if you want to get the Maia Zoe, get it for the pleasantly strong and rumbly motor in the head and not because it has dual motors. The handle motor is just a waste really. Besides, if you even try to insert the handle end into your vag, which I assume is the intended purpose, you’re going to have the charging port and some of that tacky plastic chrome inside you. I’m guessing vag gunk in the charging port probably isn’t good and I don’t know about you but, I don’t want that plastic chrome crap in my vag.

The Maia Zoe is a decent mid-sized wand massager with a couple of flaws. I’m not really sure who I could recommend it to. I guess anyone who’s looking for something that size with some pretty decent strong rumbly vibes. But perhaps the fact that they put that crappy little buzzy vibe in the handle drives the cost up a bit. If that’s the case, you may be able to find a similar wand massager for less.

Also, I have to mention – I have no idea why they spelled “twisty” as “twistty” and it bugs the shit out of me.

As always, you can save 10% on your entire order at PeepShow Toys with discount code: DIZZY

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PeepShow Toys provided the Maia Zoe Twistty Wand in exchange for an unbiased review.

  1. I realized after writing this that I should have said, Honey Badger. Because those silly ass things can get stung all over their face and give no fucks.