Want to support my blog? Clear your cookies, click the banner and shop!

Don't miss these great sex toy sales.

Jul 282013

If you’ve read this then you know that I had struggled with anorgasmia for quite a long time. It’s ultimately what led me to exploring sex toys. I was looking for anything that could help me have orgasms again. I have “normal” orgasmic functioning when not on antidepressant medications (SSRIs and SNRIs). Unfortunately, all of these medications have caused anorgasmia for me. It’s actually a pretty common side effect despite what some doctors and pharmaceutical companies would have you believe. But I simply must take the medication. Without it…life falls apart. So, I just lived with being sexually dysfunctional for many years; suffering from both low libido and anorgasmia. I finally got fed up with it and went on a search for a “cure”. The first stop on my journey was sex toys, which helped me to have orgasms again but it was still painfully difficult to get there. Having orgasms from oral sex was still impossible.

Then I decided to start researching the issue to see if there was some pharmaceutical solution to my problem and I discovered that there were in fact, several possibilities. First I tried Viagra. It didn’t help at all and was terribly expensive. The second medication I tried was Buspar and I am so happy to say, I have hit the orgasmic jackpot. Not only did the Buspar reverse the anorgasmia, I seem to be going in the other direction. I am becoming multi-orgasmic when I never was before. All of this without any negative side effects. Yeah, I’m not complaining one bit. I wake up every morning wanting to kiss my bottle of Buspar. I owe my wonderfully rekindled sex life to this drug.

Recently, I received an email from a reader who found my blog while searching for information on Buspar and anorgasmia. She said that it’s having the same effects on her. The interesting thing is, she’s not taking an SSRI or SNRI. She’s actually taking Buspar for the labeled purpose, to treat anxiety. So for her, this is a happy accident. How great would it be if this med controls her anxiety and gives her the best orgams of her life? I had never considered the possibility that Buspar would have a positive effect on sexual functioning for anyone whose difficulties were not brought on by antidepressants but apparently, it just might. She brought to my attention that there is a company developing two libido enhancing drugs for women and one of them contains buspirone (the generic Buspar).

The two drugs are named Lybrido and Lybridos (no, those names won’t be confusing at all). They are being developed by a company incorporated in both the Netherlands and the US, called Emotional Brain. They claim that the two medications can treat HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder), a form of FSD (Female Sexual Dysfunction). Emotional Brain doesn’t say much about the medications on their website but a little research led me to an article that describes the medications in more detail.

Lybrido is said to contain an ingredient similar to Viagra plus testosterone. Lybridos contains buspirone and testosterone. It seems to me that adding the testosterone might be a way for Emotional Brain to grab patents on the medications. Because in either case, the first ingredient already exists and could be prescribed off label to treat HSDD and a testosterone supplement could always be added if indicated.

However, I’m all for getting something approved specifically for the treatment of FSD but that doesn’t mean insurance companies will cover it. A lot of insurance companies, mine included, don’t cover even a portion of the cost of Viagra. When I took it, I thought they weren’t covering it because it was obviously being prescribed off label because, ya know… I don’t have a penis. But on their website I looked up coverage in my husband’s name and it was not covered for him either and we have really good insurance. The message sent by the insurance companies is that sexual functioning isn’t a necessary component of good health. Of course, we all know that’s bullshit.

And while I’m happy to see some serious efforts to develop treatments for FSD, not everyone shares my enthusiasm. Yes, once again we see the double standard. Viagra for men is of no concern but some believe that developing drugs to help a woman have a more fulfilling sex life will result in an epidemic of cheating wives and lust crazed naked women running amok in the streets. Seriously, I can’t make this shit up. Some people are actually concerned that libido boosting drugs for women could work “too” well. Do they have this same concern when it comes to drugs that enable men to have erections when they couldn’t otherwise? Probably not. In a lengthy article by Daniel Bergner in the New York Times, we see what has these people so fearful.

Beyond what might happen in millions of bedrooms, it’s even more difficult to foresee what societal transformations might be stirred. Just as with the birth-control pill, a foreboding not only about sex itself but also about female empowerment may be expressed in a dread of women’s sexual anarchy. Over the last decade, as companies chased after an effective chemical, there was fretting within the drug industry: what if, in trials, a medicine proved too effective? More than one adviser to the industry told me that companies worried about the prospect that their study results would be too strong, that the F.D.A. would reject an application out of concern that a chemical would lead to female excesses, crazed binges of infidelity, societal splintering.

“You want your effects to be good but not too good,” Andrew Goldstein, who is conducting the study in Washington, told me. “There was a lot of discussion about it by the experts in the room,” he said, recalling his involvement with the development of Flibanserin, “the need to show that you’re not turning women into nymphomaniacs.” He was still a bit stunned by the entrenched mores that lay within what he’d heard. “There’s a bias against — a fear of creating the sexually aggressive woman.”

Gaining control of their reproduction in the ‘60s affected not just women’s sex lives but also everything from their social standing to economic empowerment. What might it mean for conventional structures if women could control, with a prescription, the most primal urge? So many things, personal and cultural, might need to be recalibrated and renegotiated, explicitly or without acknowledgment. The cumulative effect of all those negotiations could be hugely transformative, in ways either thrilling or threatening, depending on your point of view.

So just be forewarned… women having rich and satisfying sex lives will surely lead to the destruction of society as we know it… or not.

Like this? Want more of it? Subscribe!

Get new posts sent to your inbox!

Get my sporadic newsletter filled with exlclusive deals, the latest sales and secret bonus giveaway codes.

  • Ima Godiva

    Interesting article. It must have been such a wonderful relief to find that medication! 🙂

  • I’m so glad you’re blogging about this info so that others can find it. The more we inform one another aobu thtis stuff the more empowered we are to take charge of our own lives.
    Too funny about the “crazed binges of infidelity” and other such nonsense. Weird world…

  • Karen B

    Wow! Never knew that about Buspar. I might need to switch meds.

  • Glumbumble

    What a load of bullshit. If anything it will make more women happy, and what’s wrong with that? Society will not come crumbling down. Give me a break. People are stupid. I hate these double standards. My husband actually finds the double standard thing very frustrating too. When we got married he was thinking that my vaginismus could be cured easily and surely there were a ton of doctors that knew about the condition and could help treat it. But nope. Most doctors say it’s in our head and the condition doesn’t exist. You’re lucky to come across a doctor that even knows what it is, and believes you and can help with treatment. But males not being able to get an erection? They’re all over that shit.

  • I’m so glad to read about the new female libido-enhancing drugs from a positive perspective. Another sex blogger that I really like wrote a pretty negative post about them, and all I could think was, “If it helps women get sexual satisfaction and feel more sexual & positive about their sexuality, then why NOT?”

    And good for you for researching and finding a medication to help you get enjoyment in your sex life back. My sex drive was non-existent on anti-depressants too, and was ultimately why I stopped taking them. My Happy Lite saved my life, let me tell you! But it would be so much better if the doctors prescribing them were more forthcoming about this “possible” side-affect (I put that in quotes b/c usually they only mention it in passing, but it seems that MANY women are affected this way.)

    • I don’t see why anyone would be against something that helps women have the sex lives they want. I guess some people might be afraid that it sends the message to women that if they have low libidos then that means something is wrong with them. And I definitely don’t want to perpetuate that.

      If a woman has a lower libido and she’s content and happy then that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with that. But if a woman is feeling distress over her low libido then it’s a wonderful thing that she has options.

      And let’s not forget that in my case it wasn’t JUST about libido…. I couldn’t have orgasms because of the medication. The Buspar brought them back. How could anyone be against a med that reverses anorgasmia? The anorgasmia and low libido were very distressing to me. In fact, my relationship with my husband was suffering.

      Things are so much better now. If I have to take a pill to have this kind of happiness again in my life, so be it. Life is too short to stress out over having to take a pill. If it helps…just take em.

  • GeekyNymph

    Thanks for sharing this piece, I found it really interesting and important. And hooray for multiple orgasms! I hope others have successes with taking it too.

  • Lustlover

    I think people who fear strong libido in others need medication!
    I actually wish we were all sex crazed! No one seems at all concerned about gratuitous abuse and neglect of people but to think that others had a strong desire to have intimacy are some how dangerous is ridiculous!
    I have tried all the “boner pills”. I luckily did not ever need them but I tried them anyway hoping to be even more oversexed and amorous! I love my lust! It makes life better. In my personal experience these medications make me get hard a little faster but they do that alone. They are not an aphrodisiac for me because they don’t make me any hornier. I would suppose being physically ready would be an aphrodisiac in and of itself but I find that if an opportunity is there I’m ready! I don’t need to be hard while watching the news unless of course I have a willing partner.
    I am delighted that this medication can bring physical parity to those with desire. Most of us should have sex way mote often then we do. After all isn’t human sexual contact really about being more human?
    I want to be more human and intimacy even if its “just sex” is a really good thing for people.
    As a last thought is it possible that the Buspar is providing anxiety relief because the patients are having more sex? It sure relieves my anxiety!

    • The company making the libido booster containing Buspar claims that it increases libido by lowering anxiety. I think it’s much more complicated than that. My problem was never anxiety. I’ve never had any anxiety over having sex. My problem is purely the chemical changes that happen in my body when I take antidepressants. Those changes lower my libido and block my ability to orgasm. Buspar reverses some of those chemical changes. This page explains how it is thought to work on certain neurotransmitters.


      • Lustlover

        I did not mean to diminish you paticular benefit. I apologize if I gave the impression that you had no different need then I spoke to. My poorly worded point was meant to state that a good sexual life is in and of itself an anxiety relief. I am truly happy that this works for you and others! I hope it continues to make your life better and more satisfying!

        • No worries. I didn’t take it in a bad way. I just wanted to clear up the thing about it relieving anxiety, which it does but I think the improvements in sexual functioning go beyond that. I get what you’re saying. Even on the internet I come across curt. 😛